It’s been a very busy, tiring day today, but it all ended well…
Up bright and early…snooze, up bright and early…snooze, up bright and early…yeah yeah you get it, we don’t wanna get up today (who even am I? Paige wouldn’t stand for this!!). The early mornings are finally getting to us, but it’s Animal Kingdom day, and the only day we have it written into our very VERY busy schedule, so…GET THE HELL UP!!
Ok, ok Dean…chill. Not too busy here today, manage to get some nice shots in front of the entrance…another few for the album. The kids cuddling and being nice to each other? Must be Disney magic…give it 10 minutes and they’ll be fighting over some trivial incident…
“Hey, nice shirt man”…”Man I like your shirt”…ah cheers bud…wait, what?! Ahh man, I’m wearing my Elsa shirt! Sure the world must be in on the joke and are just strategically bullying me. For those not in the know…where have you been? Jordan made a habit of presenting me with gifts adorned with the face of the Poodle that almost broke up my marriage, something that I now look forward to, but this was just rubbing it in mun. All bloody day this happened…Don’t break Dean, it’s what they want!
First interaction of the day; Pocahontas. Besides the kid splashing me in queue (keep cool Dean, he’s only like 3 or something) we had an incredible interaction. She had me believing she was the real deal. It did get a little crazy when she started talking to a tree though…on second thoughts, keep a wide berth kids, you don’t want what she’s taking; steer clear of the special tea. Seriously though, a very fun interaction the kids loved…I just love seeing them smiling and having a great time :)
Up the hill and across the bridge, the Tree of Life takes center stage…possibly my favourite park centrepiece, and just incredible to see…not as incredible as the new Timon and Pumba popcorn bucket and sipper though. These are a piece of junk that is destined to never again see the light of day, and will surely make packing a challenge. We needed them though…why? Well…Disney init.
Newly acquired props in hand, we treat them to a photo with the Tree of Life, and make them honorary Fletchers. Now get to the bottom of the stroller boys…see you this evening. Of course we don’t use them. Some lovely pics here…more for the album.
Every time I see it, Pandora blows my mind. It just looks incredible and where Disney really have stepped up the immersion. Gray was in awe…mainly ah how the Islands are floating…Disney magic buddy…
Right, we have a Lightening Lane for Flight of Passage…well me and Gray do anyways…sorry guys, you go ride Trippy Small World 2.0, let the men handle the Banshees. Rum Blossom for Gray, Night Blossom for me…wait? Which one is which? A drunk 6 year old? Hmmm…Bugger, just chance it Gray (thankfully he chose well, he’s bad enough as it is without being a little drunk). Right, time to board, we don’t want a repeat of departure day do we? My heart can’t cope with another stress inducting sprint to departures…I’m good for 1 every year…
WOW!! Blew Grayson’s mind…A solid 6/10 in his very honest opinion. Well it was a 10/10, but then he remembered the a whale thing scared him so he deducted points. A lot better than I remember though, solid ride and well justified wait time.
Back with the Lady Fletcher contingent, we find out they had a rumble with a local squirrel intent on stealing their popcorn…little bugger. Following a swift bare knuckle, Jordan manages to wrestle the popcorn back, and asserts her dominance by downing said popcorn in a Stone Cold Steve Austin fashion…rabies? What rabies? It’s the squirrel that should be worried what he catches from us!
The Pandora gift shop on the other hand sees another element of Fletcher anger as Grayson finds any image he can of the whale that downgraded the ride for him and beats the living hell out of it…all whilst I try distance myself from the strange child punching a t shirt…honestly mun.
A final call for the Festival of The Lion King, disrupts the day, as we are denied entry despite being offered initial refuge. Kids kick off; Alaska has a 30 minute tantrum, where focus was on retrieving her cross body bar for her stroller, and Grayson erupts in floods of tears…poor buggers, think the heat is getting to them. Bloody Simba!
Finally the carnage ceased, all is forgiven. so, hot and bothered we head to cool down…on the rapids. Bloody hate water rides, something about feeling like you’ve had a bath fully clothed just doesn’t appeal to me. Let’s hope we don’t get too wet, though every other time I’ve ridden I have been wetter than an otters pocket…ahh bugger it, it’s a warm day, I’ll dry off in an hour of so. Nice long line, plenty of time for Alaska to start a post tantrum leaf collection…why the hell not, customs are going to love us…”anything to declare”, oh yeah, just a pocketful of random leaves and twigs…Denied!
Strapped into her special seat, armed with a pocketful of leaves, Alaska loved her first rapids ride, and fortunately I was only mildly moist…the poor woman next to me dived on the metaphorical grenade and got drenched for me…cheers love, you country thanks you for the service.
Side note: America, the only place you can poop with a viewing audience, I usually save that for my Onlyfans, but when in Rome…
Enough of that…Expedition Everest!! Gray, was desperate to “punch a Yeti in the face”. Crickey Billy, where has that come from? Poor thing just wants to exist without the threat of a noodle armed 6 year old flailing windmills around to batter him. Grayson is surrounded in Animal Welfare placards as he regrets his decision and opts to calmly ride Everest instead. Seriously, where was this sort of anger when Kong was fighting the dinosaurs off for us?
Jordan’s turn, and in the meantime I appear to have joined a gang…what? People seem to have no self awareness today, and a sea of pink engulfed myself and Alaska.
Following the gang initiation, I was presented with a T Shirt of my own…we’re all catching up for a girls night next Saturday…woo.
Quick bite in Flame Tree BBQ, quick collection of a few more leaves…she hasn’t got enough to worry customs yet, and time to FINALLY buy some Magicbands. My poor arm has felt naked the last week without one…did you really Disney if you don’t pay over the odds for some flashy wrist apparel that used to be free? $202 down, and now arms with a sense of superiority, we collectively start vibrating more than … (insert innuendo here). Yeah they are interactive, flash and vibrate…but…
Quick lovely interaction with a cast member; Bri. Alaska was now on her path to become Disneys first ever dedicated Nail Artist in the making. Coming soon to the Disney cultural exchange programme. Honestly this made Alaska day, and she now had a button that was celebrating her new career choice…and everyone would soon know. Drum up that business Loo, next yeah ain’t gonna pay for itself.
Dinoland USA, to pay homage to the site of the roughest ride known to man before the whole areas is re-themed. Quick catch up with Daisy, Goofy and my boys Chip n Dale in their badass Dino gear before we head on the unnecessary mission back in time to avoid getting smashed to pieces, and/or torn to pieces. Rougher than a night out in Merthyr, but twice as fun…gonna miss that ride, it’s been there as long as I have been coming to Florida, and despite always having a concussion following it, I still enjoy.
Oh, and got to take part in the new action flick: ‘Chip n Dale: Blood Mommy!’ As I inadvertently crossed paths with a mother squirrel and a youngling…I’m used to dealing with fiesty animals, but this had me terrified.
Another doomed attraction…It’s Tough to be a Bug, rounds the day off…and it was back to the hotel for half hour before round 2. DING DING!
Check in to Artists Point: Storybook Dining at Wilderness Lodge. Almost missed it though, between Alaska’s tantrum round 2 (she wanted to show Snow White her trousers? 🤷), and then sat nav diverting us to the middle of nowhere, we did make it in the end. This resort is insane…amazing themes, absolutely mind blowingly huge and a giant Geyser in the middle.
“Dad I just burped and it smells like hotdogs”. Bloody hell Grayson, keep your intrusive thoughts to yourselves, this is an upper class of people here…Snow White will be raging.
At the table, we are immersed in awe at the atmosphere…it was incredible. The dining room was amazing, and we got to meet Dopey, Grumpy, Snow White and The Evil Queen. I know we already have 2 of the 4, just in Jordan what can seemly switch between Grumpy and Evil-ly Queeny, but these were the real deal.
Started we’re very nice, Prawns, Chicken and Mushroom soup…mmm, and Entree was a pick your own…Pork shank was delicious…so delicious I ate half of Jordan’s…well following the Pork anatomy lesson (we needed to know what the shank was).
Quick bit of weird Disney revelations from the kids, fining out Alaska has a crush on Olaf and Kristoff the Reindeer (let’s not remind her of that when she’s older), and apparently I have a crush on Snow White…which Grayson promises is true; he saw it in his dream. Protesting his love for Ariel, Grayson gave a quick put down to
Rapunzel because she smells like a dirty bag of treats…so rumor has anyways.
Grumpy finally breaks into Grayson weird delirium conversation, as we strike some poses with him and the apparent love of my life in Snow White. We are delivered our desserts…some delicious poison apples (Alaska don’t want to chance it and spat its straight back out), some cookies and cream moose and a Gooseberry tart…oh and some dry ice hearts. This was so cool.
Full of poison, we are then invited to meet the Queen…Alaska determined to break her shows off her sparkly crocs, all whilst the Queen faces a morale dilemma of abusing the kid or giving her a hug…don’t break character…just talk shit to her and strike a pose. The Queen was a fun meet, and so were the other characters…don’t see them often, and this was a prime opportunity.
Food was really good, atmosphere was fun, characters were great and interactive…we had a great time here, well worth it. And all for the Diamond Mine dirt cheap price of $264 including tax and tip…think I best send the kids down the mine to pay for it…the join the Dwarves on Monday.
Back to the hotel, full, happy and tired. Off to bed ready for tomorrow…we are back at Hollywood Studios :)
Running counts:
Lizards: 63
Squirrels: 11
Rabbits: 3
Snakes: 1
Frogs: 3
Chicken (Ibis): millions
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